my journal

0_shabutie_0 @ 2007-06-18T14:15:00

2007-06-18T13:57:21Z

So, an update.
Still waiting on my degree results, which is annoying because a friend from my course said that she had spoken to the head of department and her project tutor and they both said results would be available tomorrow from the departmental office. Having had no confirmation from uni about this I email the head of department - results will be posted within 2 weeks. This is annoying a) because I want them now and b) because why were other people told crap by the same person? the big gays.

I have done a week and a day of my teaching placement, and im really enjoying it when I get chance to actually have some imput into the lesson and actually teach. Like today was good, me and my partner Nick were in the ssc (student support center) its for kids with behavioral difficulties, they usually have 2- 3 of they're lessons there each day. So in the first period it was science, and we had 2 boys who were totally unresponsive to the teacher and to us at first, so we did some reading and then a practical (a top set year 10 coursework prac), after finding out a bit about them, they really began to enjoy taking part, and understood the aim of the prac (enzymes and temperature) it was cool to actually see learning take place in kids who have problems at home and stuff, and who think what is the point in anything?
Last week I was pupil tracking, my pupil was a year 7 boy called Sam, he was top set and really nice. So first it was french, I was so impressed with that lesson, apparently this class of year 7's were already at at least a year 10 level. They were really well behaved and did exactly what the teacher asked (I havent seen much of that so far, only year 10 seem to care about work.) Next was maths, then Drama/ English which was really good, they had to make an advert about a cleaning product, some were so funny they really made me laugh!
After that it was science, they're teacher wasn't in so we had a french teacher come over. The lesson was about genes, and because the supply teacher didnt know much I was the one who checked work, and when 2 girls did all the work that the teacher had left, I was asked to give them some more! It was really cool helping them understand about the differences that environment and genes make on apprearance. Yeah I enjoyed it alot, some of them are so bright!
The downsides are that not all classes are like that, some are huge and of lower ability which I think is a bit dodgey, apparently classes should not be bigger than 30, but it seems that a fair amount of science classes are bigger than this, and in lower ability groups it is hard for the teachers to remain fully in control of a lesson. Also, the workload is alot bigger that I expected, I knew that there was a lot of work to be done outside of classes but there is stuff you forget about, the science teachers who have a year 10 class will have at least 90 pieces of coursework per class to mark over the summer, also new lesson schemes need to be learnt because the sylibus has changed, then lessons need to be planned, and other pieces of work need to be marked, open days need to be planned and reports need to be written for every year at least twice a year, then parents evening needs to be sorted. Halls and stuff need to be monitored during lunch and break. Im sure there is more but thats just for a base level teachers.
So Im still thinking about becoming a teacher but it is alot of work and the training is very hard. But I haven't been put off yet.
I get to teach for 30 mins on my last week with Nick so we need to start lesson planning which will be cool.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2007-05-15T20:24:00

2007-05-15T19:40:43Z

I love the guy who does the 'how to look good naked' program he's awsome. The entire program is awsome, we need more of this sort of thing on the tv, stuff that lets you know that its ok not to be perfect, because nobody is. I mean I didn't need the tv to tell me this, but some people do. I want a gay guy to tell me that he loves my bangers all the time and buy my clothes! Its making me want to go out and buy lots of underwear! Damn my lack of money!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2007-05-15T18:02:00

2007-05-15T17:20:42Z

So I have done a set for SG, but I'm not keeping my hopes up really, even though Cherry did a really good job at making me look nice, I just dont think I stand out enough, I'm not saying 'oh Im so ugly' I'm just saying that yeah I'm alright, but looking at other girls and other sets I don't think that I stand out enough considering how many girls they have now, and how many girls apply. I will be upset if I don't get accepted, and I will try again with a more stand out theme (probably star trek), but I wont be surprised.
On a happier note, my exams will be over this time next week, so yay!
I think I may have to use my savings to support myself until I get a job, but It means I can finally buy some new clothes for the summer, Iv seen so many dresses I want to buy.
Well that was boring, I apologise

0_shabutie_0 @ 2007-05-05T11:55:00

2007-05-05T11:47:08Z

So, its 3 exams down and 2 to go. I'm so so so bored of revision now, and I'm procrastinating as we speak, well not really I'm printing out some past papers. Iv found them very useful actually, although it is making me sort of question spot a bit, but so far I have been lucky and have not really been caught out yet, there was one question that sort of surprised me, but I had revised southern blotting for another section of the exam so might just manage a pass on that question. I just really want them over now, just cant be fucked any more, luckily for me my pathology exam will have 3 questions on cancer (half of the exam) and I have already revised and answered a question on cancer for my human disease unit. Well that's enough exam talk, its making me depressed just thinking about the next 3 weeks.
Last night me and Dan went to Frankie and Benny's for our 3 year anniversary, it was tasty, then we went to tesco and bought king of the hill and some beer and printer ink, then came home and Paul, Nick, Joe and Danny K came round, it was nice to see everyone.
I'm really looking forward to the 11th, feels like I haven't seen Hannah and everyone for AGES!
Well time to do some more revision

0_shabutie_0 @ 2007-04-24T13:30:00

2007-04-24T12:44:28Z

So its my first exam tomorrow, it is also the easiest exam Il have, so if my maths is correct I need a mark of 42% on my exam to get an overall grade of 2.1, because I have already gotten at least 18% saved from my coursework. Eeep Im really scared, I have another exam on friday that I need to get 42-45% for my 2.1. Exams are lame, my final one is on May 23rd I cant wait I am going to get so out of my face that night! and every night this summer. Ok maybe not every night I do have to get a job. Booo but actually having money will be nice.
And yeah Dan got me a new engagement ring for our 3 year anniversary, its a bit bling but I love it. It has a sapphire in the middle and diamonds around it. I was pretty suprised when as I was falling asleep he told me that he had been considering buying me a new one for a while. Ahhh thats my punk as fuck man for you!

ARGH EXAM!!!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2007-03-25T16:20:00

2007-03-25T15:37:13Z

Went to see 300 on friday, it was really good, very epic and gory but still very good, the way it was shot made it look uber cool. O yeah and the almost naked men EVERYWHERE made it brilliant. I'd forgotten how good a nice pair of thighs can look! There were muscles in every direction, but they wern't nasty Mr. universe style muscles, they were nice..... very nice.
so yes, go and see it.

In other news Iv finished uni, and have started revision. first exam is 24th April, which is a bit scary, but its the easiest one, last exam is 27th May, with another 3 exams in between. O yeah, I also joined the gym yesterday but cant start till tomorrow when I have my induction, I really had no excuse not to start now term has finished, I cant sit in the house revising and doing nothing else, because I would turn into a heffer and that would be bad. The gym is a bit posh too, and it has all the nice sauna type extras included, and the aerobics and other classes included, we will see if I decide to use the pool, the thought makes me feel ill but its good for you I spose and they do put chlorine in it.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2007-02-20T20:07:00

2007-02-20T20:10:48Z

This is my dating persona

The Peach
Random Gentle Love Master (RGLMf)

Playful, kind, and well-loved, you are The Peach.

For such a warm-hearted, generous person, you're surprisingly experienced in both love and sex. We credit your spontaneous side; you tend to live in the moment, and you don't get bogged down by inhibitions like most women your age. If you see something wonderful, you confidently embrace it.

Your exact opposite:
The Nymph

Deliberate Brutal Sex Dreamer

You are a fun flirt and an instant sweetheart, but our guess is you're becoming more selective about long-term love. It's getting tougher for you to become permanently attached; and a guy who's in a different place emotionally might misunderstand your early enthusiasm. You can wreck someone simply by enjoying him.

Your ideal mate is adventurous and giving, like you. But not overly intense.

DREAD: The False Messiah

CONSIDER: The Loverboy, The Playboy, or The Boy Next Door

Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.

and this is dans

FACT: The apocalypse has come. All are dead. You never should've asked her out.

The Last Man on Earth
Random Brutal Sex Dreamer (RBSDm)

Shit, rejected again. You are The Last Man on Earth.

Sorry, but most women would rather see the human species wither to an end--and therefore deny the most fundamental instinct that living creatures have--than sleep with you.

We've learned the following: you don't think things through. You're haphazard. You're dangerous. You're somewhat inexperienced. It's totally obvious that you're a horny bugger, as well. Everybody knows that and steers clear.

To top things off, when you do find your way into a relationship, you tend to be a dick somewhere down the line and fuck it all up.

Your exact opposite:
The Gentleman

Deliberate Gentle Love Master

There's a small, but negligible, chance we're wrong. In any case, your friends find your shit hilarious. There's nothing cooler than a dude reducing himself to human rubble.

ALWAYS AVOID: The Sonnet

CONSIDER: Half-Cocked, The Nymph

Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.

just because i feel like offloading.

2007-02-15T20:23:38Z

Long time no update.
So how shit are things at the moment? Pretty shit actually. Where to begin?
Well lets start with the project - I hate it, its nearly done, I need about another 2000 words by monday time so I can send it to my tutor two weeks before the deadline (who probably wont read it or give me any kind of help - why change the habit of a lifetime. Its only worth 20% of my degree and everything). So this weekend will compromise of work and not much else.
Then the shit that went down. Well it was my fault but its still shit, I forgot I had a practical this morning, because I knew I had a tutorial and normally its one one week and one the other. So I get there 40 mins late and have to lie because this prac (and its write up) is worth 12% of this units coursework marks, so I lie and say I was at the doctors. So then my tutor says I have to hand in a doctors note with my write up! FUCK!! well I decided not to give her a doctors note or anything else unless she asks for it, in which case I have got a copy of a prescription (I had to go to the clinic and tell them I had thrush!) with today's date on so hopefully that will be that. Whilst at the clinic I was told that I should seriously think of coming off the injection because new research says that after 2 years its bad for your bones (I have been on it 3 years).
Work have owed me money for the past 3 weeks, and I have had to hassle and hassle until I got the guy who was supposed to be sorting it bollocked by his boss(he hadn't even told pay role I'd quit!) so on tuesday he rang me to say he was putting in 2 weeks and 5hrs overtime in my account- even tho i'm only owed a week! apparently it should take three days so if its not in my account tomorrow I am going to kick off big time.
My teaching application will be going off tomorrow,after my meeting with my head of department who is going to be my referee, even tho I haven't been able to get any experience. The experience thingy I have planned is at the beginning of may, which is guess what?! yeah you guessed it EXAM TIME!!! EURGH nothing can ever go right ever can it??
Erm anything else I can rant about?
O yeah I got nothing for valentines day, not that it bothers me about the day, but I wanted presents!!
My mum wont buy me new glasses, I have received £0.00 from my mum since I left home, except bday and crimbo presents so she could at least fork out for something I actually need, seeing as its her fault I need glasses in the first place!
And i think that might be it. Well done if you got this far!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2006-08-19T00:08:00

2006-08-18T23:11:40Z

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJhuwihy7FE

amazing! hannah i imagine you will apreciate the guy with the afro, what an ultimate fox!

snakes on a plane was actually really really good, im very impressed, everyone MUST see it...... go... now!!!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2006-06-15T14:50:00

2006-06-15T14:07:33Z

wow, hello livejournal, hasnt been such a long time since we last spoke? even so i still have very little of interest to say, i got my hair cut on tuesday, went to under your hat cos thats where i went last time and shock of all horrors the hairdresser didnt cut my hair too short (it was a little too long tho) so i thought il go back there again! so i did and it was a bloke who was going to be doing the cutting (iv never had my hair cut by a man before and i dont think i will again cos he bruised my head he was that rough!) and guess what, he cuts it about an inch and a half too short, but at least my undercut has fully grown out now. fucking hairdressers, they ruin lives they fucking do! so im gonna go and get some extensions to put in the front at some point.
not much has been going on, katherine rang the other day and asked whats been happening, i had nothing! its a sad state of affairs indeed. but we shall be ooout on the weekend methinks. work is lame, moving house is lame, planning what the new flat will look like when iv finnished with it is fun! no shitty un matching plates etc for me! have you seen the chandeleer in the big brother house? well they have a similar one in urban outfitters, for £175, i think all our lovly friends should club together and buy it for us as a housewarming gift! o and also its my birthday soon, altho most of this most important day will be spent travelling home from spain, but a night out on the following weekend may be planned.
and yes holiday!!!! wooooo!!!!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2006-04-21T14:29:00

2006-04-21T13:50:48Z

i read today in the newspaper that a post op transvestite has been allowed to have £2,500 worth of tattoo removal done on the nhs because the tattoo on her ankle makes her feel masculine. i am actually outraged by this, everyone knows that tattoo's are perminant and must accept this fact, so i say tough shit, if you wanted to feel feminine then why have the tat in the first place? this money could go towards actually saving peoples lives, its not as if the nhs has plenty of money to go spending on someone who didnt think about the future, this woman has already had thousands spent on gender reasignment, and it is just not on, i accept that she may have needed the gender swap op to lead a normal life but tattoo removal!!? its your own fucking fault, if in the future i realised that my ink made me unhappy and i went to my gp to get it removed im sure i would get told to fuck off, and rightly so! the state of this country makes me sad because i dont want to bring up children here, theres just no way! look at the schools for instance, my sister is still at priestnall and from what iv heard from her its gone to shit, girls drink alchahol in class, the teachers are scared of the pupils because they are all newly qualified and dont have a clue how to handle teenagers.
priestnall was a good school when we went there, mainly due to the fact that the teachers actually had experience. im not sure why the teachers left, probably due to the fact that kids today are fucking scarey! teachers have no protection from them, and most parents dont want to know. The pay isnt all that good either.
i am so out of here when i have kids, i cant think of anything that puts me off more about having children than the society that will surround them.

in other news, had an interview today, to go for a proper interview next week, altho im hoping i get the job in the bookies down the road, i sent my application off this morning.
might go to the cinema later to see silent hill, it got good reviews so why not

0_shabutie_0 @ 2006-03-21T19:41:00

2006-03-21T19:41:16Z

today i trecked to the bus deppo, to pick up my purse wich i left on a bus like an idiot, im so glad iv got it back cos it had my driving license, and my uni rider which still has 3 months of bus travel left, i would have had to phone the police and get a crime number if i wanted a replacement, and even then stagecoach wouldnt HAVE to give me one so im happy.
i need chocolate, lindt preferably, but i refuse to go outside. thursday is exams one and two, i am slightly worried about them tbh, because i am bad at molecular cell biology, and i dont revise it well because i hate it too much! friday is a presentation infront of half of my class, so around 50 people possibly on septaeceamia (well its what i think the little boy has but i could be wrong) and then my final exam, in pathology, so it should go ok. then i will hop on a bus to leeds and party!
i have an interview on monday so fingers crossed!! im still not too sure what im gonna be doing, but i know its in customer services, i think its possibly to do with marketing...... am i ready to sell my soul to the devil? yes, for ink, and items i am.
pokemon snap should arrive at my house in a few days im soooo exited! whooot!!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2006-02-28T23:52:00

2006-03-01T00:18:12Z

boys and alcohol.
im getting a headache from the gritting of teeth because i dont really like this person. this person isnt really you, well its not my version of you so keep it away from me.
altho do girls act like completly different people when friends and alcohol are involved, i dont think we turn into immature stupid little children, do we?

enough of that.
first driving lesson went ok, its just all so confusing doing so many things with different body parts all at once. but i spose it will take time.

tattoo is being booked tomorrow for next wednesday i think, i was gonna email daryl palumbo and ask for him to write it out so i can have it inked on me but have now decided that would be silly, instead i am having old style typewriter font i think.

dan keeps turning the screen off cos he wants attention so i best go.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2006-02-26T18:04:00

2006-02-26T18:17:19Z

so it finnaly came to me last night, how i can have a glassjaw tattoo, without having anything that i could possibly regret, so i am going to get worship, tattoo'd on the inside of my right elbow, and tribute tattoo'd on the inside of my left, i cant believe i hadnt thought of this earlier, im gonna go book my appointment on tuesday im soo exited!
in other news i am going on the 'japanese women dont get old or fat' diet, basically il eat steamed fish rice veg, clear soups, sushi and fruit, and go running for 30 mins a day, so il be nice and thin for the holiday, and actually feel ok on the beach. yes this is the plan, and it should be fairly easy to follow too seing as i love all that kind of thing.

nothing else to report, except that bristol was ace, and the drive there and back was a bit of a adventure! im sure hannah will tell all!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2006-02-22T15:08:00

2006-02-22T15:16:05Z

just had my final statistics exam, it is now 15:09 and they wont be up untill 15:30 so that there is no way people can cheat. im feeling rather worried as i only managed to answer 10.5 out of 18 questions, due to the fact that its negatively marked, so i only answered questions i actually knew the answers too. so if all goes well and i did know the answers i should get about 50% and if i dont i will cry because it basically fucks up the rest of next year cos i wont be allowed to do the year placement if i fail. in other news i passed my other exams, i scraped a pass for molecular cell biology but that was to be expected, AND i got 75% on my pathology exam! thats the best mark iv had so far. i also found that one of the lecturers has some microbiology program for over the summer where you get paid pretty well so i will come and see him tomorrow methinks. ugh i feel sick with worry about this now 15 more minutes til i find out wether iv fucked up my degree. i shall sit here and finnish the princess bride to take my mind off it

0_shabutie_0 @ 2006-02-15T11:52:00

2006-02-15T12:15:50Z

wow an update, you are all very lucky children indeed. the ntl man should be here in a few hours, we are having the internet, telephone and cable deal for 32.99 a month, how grown up are we!! were gonna have a landline! and sky one so i can watch brainiacs, with the oh so strangly yummy richard hammond. been doing about four or five hours revision for the past 3 days, mainly because im not in uni so i can, and because i may have not been to quite a few lectures so i need to. my pathology exam is worth 20% but i actually understand the unit, and my molecular cell biology exam is worth 7.5% i can do the bacterial genetics, but the energy relationships and the equasions i cannot do. i can read the words and understand the words but not the whole sentence, its really that bad. im not too worried, because its only worth 7.5% and iv done about40% of the unit already and feel confident that its ok.

in other news cedrick is back with his mummy, and adopted father, yay he really is the cutest thing evar. katamari is really very good, i was playing for about 3 hours last night without realising it was so late, so i win the best valentines present award. i finnish uni in 5 and a half weeks, well not finnish, i go on placement for 6 months which is my last unit of the year. hopefully i will be in a microbiology lab, because the main job il be required to do will be a gram staining apparently, which i can now do without any instructions or stopwatch, ooooh get me! going to leeds this weekend, should be fun, dan is a bit upset that he's gonna have to sleep in a bed on his own, poor baby! yes your punk as fuck, i think not!

the ntl guy is here, and the room is a tip!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2005-12-23T14:28:00

2005-12-23T14:29:44Z

i need somthing done to my hair, i really want it short, but then i want it long, i want it red, or green or anything!! just somthing a bit WOW need help, and a good hairdresser.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2005-12-22T20:05:00

2005-12-22T20:09:10Z

serves me right for leaving myself logged in i spose.

but yes i was a drunken disgrace, but i havnt been that drunk in well, years! so its ok im allowed.

nothing happening and im bored, but too lazy to do anything about it. so im going to look for a new plug on wildcat. that should keep me busy for 15mins.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2005-12-21T11:01:00

2005-12-21T11:01:54Z

I am a filthy drunkard, what a twat I am!

My god, I lose.

Dan rocks.

i should give dan blowjobs.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2005-12-13T13:29:00

2005-12-13T13:36:01Z

"In loving someone, you worship them like a deity and it hurts, a lot, to the point that in trying to show love and show tribute to someone you're stretching and reaching. It becomes an unhealthy worship and you'll bow out unfaithfully in the end,"

i love daryl palumbo, i think i can safely say that Glassjaw are the most amazing band in the world, they may have well changed my life infact.

so i think it is just right that i get some kind of tribute tattoo'd on myself. unsure what tho yet

"our fans would take a bullet for us and rightfully so, because we would kill or be killed for anyone who is devoted to our band."

And he isnt wrong there either.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2005-11-23T13:07:00

2005-11-23T13:15:58Z

im supposed to be in uni but i just cant be arsed, i know im going to fail this unit so why bother, i cant actually do it, maths and me shoudlnt mix.

so iv been thinking about the moving to leeds thing quite alot. im dead exited and it would be ace if it could happen without me having to do too much extra work. i think i can handle one or two units more, but then iv also been thinking, i could stay at manchester, depending what the timetable is like. next term its wednesday thursday friday, if next year was like that i could stay there, get the coach on the wednesday, stay at my mums on wednesday and thusday nights and get the coach back on friday, this would be the best solution i think, because it would keep my mum happy, and i could still get my degree which is accredited by the biomedical scientist group or whatever its called.

im gonna ring leeds today, and check what 3rd year timetable is like tomorrow, and way up.

in other news, i have been a lazy bitch for the past 4 days, and now i feel really guilty. i want to see harry potter tonight but dan wont come.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2005-11-17T14:19:00

2005-11-17T14:40:05Z

not updated for a very long time.

this is mainly because i feel i have nothing to give, nothing of interest to say. this in turn has lead me to see just how superficial my life really is. i dont belive in anything really, except science, which is the only thing im really any good at talking about, i cant theorise why were all here, i dont actually care, im so lazy, i dont give my friends the time they deserve, and as a consiquence they dont give me time. i dont bother with trying to find new bamds anymore, i do my uni work, but only because i have to. i feel like a complete waste of space. all i feel that i do well and with passion is love, my family, friends and my wonderful boy. i think i could do better at this too.
iv been thinking about a new tattoo, and decided that my tattoo's look nice, and i am happy with them they make me feel pretty, but they hold no real meaning, and i want somthing that is special to just me. but i cant really think of anything that i can honestly say, IS ME. i love to read, and i love my music, i like films and comedy, but i cant think of anything that makes me any different from anyone.
I have no ability to write anything beutiful, i cant draw it, i cant play it. I have no real talent with anything, im a nice girl,(i think) and i imagine thats what people will say about me when i die, nothing like she was really deep, or talented, funny or beutiful, im just a boring girl who will fade, who people forget about, or even worse, someone people dont care about.
even if i knew how to change this, i probobly wouldnt, im not motivated enought, and i spose im a bit scared.
i could go on forever, but i know my image crisis will be boring those who bothered to read.

0_shabutie_0 @ 2005-09-28T14:48:00

2005-09-28T13:52:04Z

am in uni on the computors as we are bored, i finnaly feel like im fitting in at uni, and its nice, the girls who i hang around with on free's have asked me to come out tonight, i think thats me being accepted? i dunno i havnt been in this situation where iv been trying to make friends for a long time.

uni is good, still get 2 days off, and i have no exams this year either so i think i can safely say this year is gonna be good. and from april i can go and work in a proper lab, one in a hospital or a research facility and earn 500 quid a month. wheee good things happening finnaly!!

0_shabutie_0 @ 2005-09-23T22:00:00

2005-09-23T21:07:13Z

it smells like autumn, the smell of autumn is slightly damp leaves, and walking home autumn was all over the place.
dan hates my face, cos i didnt want to stay at his on my own. so therefor he hasnt gone out, i dont mind the going out when im at his bit, in the slightest, i used to, but iv gotten used to it and dont flap as much as i used to, but the waking up in a house that isnt mine, without him would just make me lonly and sad. o and the reason why i didnt want to stay at mine was cos its a treck from work, both ways, plus the traffic will make me uber late. plus i had to use the internet to get my uni rider if i want it before my mega rider runs out.

i feel awful tho, and he wont speak to me :(

is everyones hotmail broken or is it just gods way of punnishing me for being an awful person?

i should have known you were no angel by the way you said my name

2005-09-04T20:04:35Z

so i did my first ever pill last night... i was soo scared i was gonna die but im happy that iv tried it and i enjoyed it. i now understand why people do it, its way better than drinking, cos you are in control, very social and it somehow makes you be able to vocalise a feeling, mainly because everyone else feels the same and its just fun. plus you wake up hangover free! i dont see why people need to do them all the time, its just a bit sad i think. Had good talks with hannah, and with dan, it reasured me because im always a bit unsure about stuff ( well everything)a and i dont think pills make you do stuff you wouldnt, it just makes the truth easier to say. so i feel very in love and lucky, because now i really i know, you know?

im also quite lucky with the way pills worked on me, i came up after about half an hour (1130pm?), and at about 315amish i was back to normal, but wide awake, and by the time we got to bed at about 6am i was tierd. and manages to have the most perfect deep and needed sleep. i think its because i must digest quite quickly, im the same on mushrooms, im always 30 mins ahead of dan.

so today went to a bbq at my mums, it was quite nice, i got some spending money and some pully suitcase's and also tomorrows tea. the whole family was there, including Dave, my aunt's 'boyfriend' even tho he's a complete twat, and she's making a fool of herself by continuing this pointless relationship, she has a daughter.. he has 2 kids by 2 different women, and he wants nothing to do with her child. and has even finnished the relationship twice because of it, yet here he is, having a meal with our family when he wants nothing to do with her kid. twat.

tomorrow involves sorting out getting stuff ready for the holiday.... i cant wait, im so exited.